Individual One's wife goes to Sean Hannity for a humanizing interview and no the hell thank you
Yeah, okay, so Melania Trump went to get herself interviewed by, of course, Sean F--king Hannity, presumably as part of a please don't send my crooked family to prison speaking tour or something. Melania Trump, mind you, has spent most of these two White House years having nothin' to say about nothin'. There's been no cruelty on the part of her husband that has resulted in a public scolding, no freakish new policy or child detention camp that has rated more than a designer-coat slogan. Her approval rating has dropped to a dismal 43 percent, and yes apparently «first lady approval ratings» are a thing, and so here we are sitting down with Donald's frothiest public supporter, Sean F--king Hannity, a man absolutely devoted to the notion that Donald Trump should seize command of government, end this rule-of-law and democracy-is-good bullshit, and do whatever the hell he wants so long as Sean F--king Hannity, also known as Michael Cohen's third client, stays out of prison.
Fine, whatever, let's just do this thing and get it over with. After supporting many of the actions of her husband's sewer-pipe administration and having absolutely zip to say about the rest of it, Melania is currently most peeved that the little people are trading on her name.
«I would say the opportunists who are using my name or my family's names to advance themselves, from comedians to journalists, to performers, bookwriters,» she said in an interview with Fox News host Sean Hannity which aired Wednesday.
It's not clear from that whether she's more outraged that people are telling stories about her and Donald or that she and Donald aren't getting their proper cut of the profits. But yeah, she doesn't like «opportunists.» That's clearly been the Trump family motto, over the years: Do what you want in business, kids, but don't be opportunists about it. Also, no bullying please. Melania Trump does not care for bullies.
Oh, right, the bully was right there the whole time. How awkward.
«So as I said before, sometimes he listens and sometimes he doesn’t,» she said. «I said, 'You know, I don't think you need to tweet that out.' But in the end it's his decision, he knows the consequences. He is an adult, but he is a fighter.»
Who is this interview for? Why now, on the heels of Michael Cohen going to prison, and Paul Manafort going to double-prison, and the NRA's Russian spy pleading out and federal and state prosecutors signaling in no uncertain terms that her husband is most definitely positively involved in The Crimes, is anyone thinking that a soft-focus profile of Individual 1’s spouse is going to patch anything, anywhere, up? Is this Melania testing the waters for her own tell-all book, once Individual 1 is behind prison bars or hiding in an Ecuadorian embassy? Is it a Fox News attempt to, having failed completely at humanizing their party-leading malignant narcissist and sociopath, instead suggest that well golly all this talk about what crimes Donald Trump and his offspring did or didn't do is if nothing else terribly stressful for his rich-as-snot don't-give-a-rats-ass-about-you-and-never-did family. Law enforcement sticklers are so terribly mean.
I don't know. We are clearly not the target audience. And I'm not buying a tell-all book about the tribulations of having to support an authoritarian psychopath as he makes a wreck of everything he touches because Money so you can kiss all the way off with that one in advance, thank you very much
We sincerely, sincerely do not care. Do u?